Who decided that Hayden Panettiere was interesting?

The Jesus-lovin' US of A. And the geeks.

This isn't about what Hayden Panettiere does in her day-to-day schedule but rather about what she doesn't do. Or doesn't appear to do. Around here, she is an oddity—a perky young celebrity who is as pure as the driven snow. And not that kind of snow.

I can see how the Panettiere phenomenon could be confusing to someone living outside the Los Angeles Rehab Belt. But consider how often we're treated to Mount Britney blubbering into her wigs or yet another report about how Lindsay is doing in that rehab hidey-hole in Utah, and things should become quite clear.
An 18-year-old TV star who seems to have resisted the candy-like appeal of prescription pills and the virgin-white dazzle of the coke spoon?

A famous teenager who shuns the ever revolving squadron of supertatted, pseudo-bad-boy pop rockers that have become the go-to dating pool for Nicole Richie and Ashlee Simpson?

A girl—a blonde, even—who can stand obediently on the red carpet in a ball gown without facing questions about a sex tape or DUI?

Now that's interesting.

Yes, she says, she has been to clubs where they serve alcohol, but, she claims, that's about it.
"I can honestly say I have never seen or touched a drug in my life," Panettiere told a reporter last month.

The first group to anoint Hayden as something other than a bland former child star was the Heroes viewership. Save the cheerleader, save the world and all that. And Panettiere, as the indestructible high school student in that hit show, just happened to be said cheerleader.

If the Heroes catchphrase happened to be Please God Make Masi Oka Stop Squealing Like a Girl, Panettiere might have ended up as just another ensemble castmember, wedged somewhere between Greg Grunberg's paunch and that kid who can talk to machines.

"Looks like she's the luckiest girl in town," X17online.com West Coast editor Tomm Taylor says. "I imagine there are so many 18-year-olds that really envy her."

The next group to discover Panettiere and add to her fame: horny older men. Perhaps you've caught a whiff of the pedophilic craving wafting around our golden girl-woman, who just turned 18. If you can find a copy of the June 29 issue of Entertainment Weekly that isn't totally stuck together, you'll understand my point.

One last aspect to Hayden's fame: the wait. Right now, America loves her because she dresses real pretty and won't turn America's kids into needle-wielding skinheads.

But now comes the media vigil: Will Hayden fall pregnant by Milo Ventimiglia? Will her success go to her head, forcing her into apoplexy if she fails to find that her trailer has not been filled with her daily supply of white calla lilies?

It's the same reason why Miley Cyrus—who we have just learned is still a virgin, y'all—recently made the cover of People. Is she pregnant now? Now?

How about now? Pure. It's the new fascinating.